Moby wanted to "throw [himself] out of a window" after the 2002 MTV Awards
The 52-year-old musician became a global sensation after the release of his 1999 album 'Play' - which sold over 10 million copies and had every track licensed to an advert, movie or TV show - but fame caused him to party hard and battle against anxiety and depression
25 May 2018
He said: "As fame and wealth and drinking and drug use increased, so did narcissism and entitlement... and anxiety and depression. And usually those came when things were great.
"There was one experience in 2002, an MTV Awards in Barcelona. I was staying at this super-fancy hotel, and I'd just won an award. And I was so anxious and depressed, all I wanted to do was throw myself out of the window, but the windows didn't open wide enough."
The 'Porcelain' hitmaker also recalled feeling suicidal in his New York apartment in 2007 - when only the fear of his body smelling like a garbage bag stopped him from taking his own life.
He told the Daily Telegraph newspaper: "I'd read an article about how one of the ways [people] kill themselves is by tying plastic bags around their heads. So I tried that.
"The bag smelled strongly of polyvinyl chloride. So even though I was blind drunk and out of my mind on drugs, some little voice in my head said, 'Your last moment on earth should not be smelling the inside of a garbage bag.'
"So, that didn't work."
Moby has been sober since 2008 but insists he never had a big wake-up call moment, he was simply tired of feeling "sick and despondent".
He said: "It was thousands and thousands of experiences of just feeling sick and despondent. I would go out, have 15 drinks, buy $100 of cocaine, stay up until six in the morning, take three Xanax and a couple of Vicodin to try and sleep, wake up at five in the afternoon... and I just felt terrible."
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