Valerie Bertinelli has admitted her late ex-husband Eddie Van Halen "wasn't a soulmate"

Explaining she had sat down to watch her son Wolfgang Van Halen's episode of 'Behind the Music' on Paramount+, the 64-year-old star told her Instagram followers: "It was not easy. I'd stopped it many times because it was just too brutal to watch for many reasons.

"One, seeing Wolfie's pain. Two, seeing what a better job I could have done as a parent even though he turned out magnificently. I made a lot of mistakes.

"And three, seeing what I had turned of Ed's and my relationship - into some sort of fantasy, soulmate recreation of history."

Valerie went on to recall how her relationship with the 'Jump' hitmaker "rapidly declined" because of his drug and alcohol abuse, as well as infidelity.

She added: "Nothing that makes you feel loved and wanted and cared for. Nothing that would scream soulmate, that's for sure.

"But after Ed died, I was more than willing to put myself in the grieving widow category for a man that I hadn't lived with for 20 years."

But the Golden Globe-winning actress is thankful for the fact the marriage gave her her beloved son.

She said: "What we had together was this beautiful son that we both unconditionally loved.

"That's what I got out of that marriage was Wolfie, the best thing that ever happened to me. Not a soulmate."

Wolfgang himself admitted it has been "difficult" to open up about his father on 'Behind the Music'.

He wrote on X: "I had the honor of being asked to tell my story on Behind The Music.

"It was difficult, but also incredibly cathartic being able to reflect on my experiences, the incredible people I'm blessed to have in my life and most importantly, my bond with my father. I don't normally talk so openly about things, so this was new for me.(sic)"