It was three years ago that Cameron Merino and Macarena Letelier, without knowing each other, decided to download a dating app.
Both were on their own journeys of exploring sexuality and gender, and after matching, the connection between them was instant.
The couple have been inseparable ever since their first date, including through Cameron's gender transitioning process.
This is their story in their words.
Instant connection
Cam: Mac was the first to make a move, that's how everything started. She was very straightforward and said, "I want to meet you."
I wasn't transitioning yet, so I was kind of female-looking. But I knew I was non-binary, because I was never comfortable being called a girl, woman, lady, female, or whatever. I told Mac and she was cool about it.
Mac: I wasn't using any labels for my sexuality, because I was trying to figure it out. I knew I liked girls, boys and non-binary people, 100 per cent — I'm very loving. Right now, I'm bisexual, but sometimes I feel very pansexual as well … I just like people.
When I saw Cam, I thought, "I need to match with this human being right now." I swiped right, and when we matched, I talked to him right away.
After a whole day talking, I asked if he wanted to go on a date with me. After meeting, we've only spent one day apart, and we've been together for three years now.
Realising I was trans
Cam: I started searching trans guys online and watching videos of them going on testosterone, and I always liked the change. I became obsessed with these videos.
When I looked at myself in the mirror, I didn't look how I felt in my brain.
I would think I looked so masculine, but then someone would call me a lady, and I'd be like, "Do I look like a lady?" It was so uncomfortable.
One night I was with Mac, we were nine months into the relationship, and I started feeling so dysphoric in my body and had a full-on breakdown.
I had to tell Mac straight away, because I was almost crying. I told her I might be trans because I'm not happy with how I look, my voice, I'm not happy being called a girl.
She was supportive from the beginning. She said, "I was waiting for you to transition." She already knew I was trans.
The next day, Mac had looked up the phone number of a psychologist and an endocrinologist. She had everything ready. I was so thankful because I was scared to do it by myself.
The transition process
Mac: When Cam said, "You know what? I'm going to do it," it was like a switch for me and the next day I started doing my research.
I wanted [to find] a GP that was inclusive to the LGBTQIA+ community and an endocrinologist that wouldn't judge, but it was hard. I went with Cam to every single appointment, because it was uncomfortable and painful with the lack of education [in the medical world].
Cam: The GP didn't know much about being transgender. He called me she/her the whole time and asked, "Are you sure you feel this way?" I said, "Of course, that's why I'm here."
The transitioning process was way easier than I expected. I thought it was going to be a long process to start the hormones, but I had my first appointment at the end of July and started transitioning in September.
I needed to tell my family and the people around me, because otherwise they would be asking what was going on with my voice.
The first person was my mum. She lives in Sydney, and I live on the Gold Coast, so I called her. She was so supportive, even though [at that point] she didn't understand much about it.
I told the rest of my family in a group chat. It took them a while to get the pronouns and my name right, but they were willing to learn and understand. Everyone was very supportive; we went to the Mardi Gras together. I have a gay cousin, so in my family everyone is an LGBTQ ally.
Navigating the changes as a couple
Cam: The two most common options for hormones are a testosterone gel that you apply on your tummy, and injections. I was scared of needles, so I went for the gel.
The changes were quick. There are some changes to your vulva, and that started three days after. After three weeks, the smell of my body changed, then in the second month my voice started changing. I sweated so much in the first couple of months.
The only negative side was that you get mood swings because your hormones are all over the place.
I'd be moody some days without knowing why, and I couldn't cry easily either. Something that would have made me cry before would now make me angry.
That affected our relationship, because Mac was trying to understand and be supportive. I felt bad that I was putting her through all my mood swings. I said to her, "I'm so sorry, I don't know how to control this."
Now that I've been on testosterone for almost two years it's levelled, but all those challenges helped us be a better couple, to understand and support each other, knowing that the relationship is so much more important than a little misunderstanding or argument.
Mac: I had forgotten about the mood swings, but that was hard. At the same time, we were very mindful of our mental health as a couple and individually.
It wasn't like he would be angry, and I would just accept that. We worked through it, and I think we now manage everything so well because of that. It was a learning process.
As Cam kept going with the transition, we also started working on our relationship on a deeper level and grew as a couple. I'm a somatic sex coach, and I work very inclusively, so I had the tools already.
The transition is just one small but awesome, positive thing in our relationship. It feels like it was meant to be. He's happy and enjoying life, so that makes me happy.
I'm very bisexual, so for me, it wasn't an issue that my previously female-presenting partner was going to be male presenting.
I like both versions of my partner. Our sexual life is very active since he started testosterone.
Cam: From the beginning, I knew Mac was the person I wanted next to me for my whole life. I never got this kind of support from a partner before. If I was confused about something, Mac would always validate my feelings. Not trying to change me, always trying to understand me.
Quotes have been edited for clarity and brevity.
